COM Test 3 Essay

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Semantic Rules
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Reflect the ways in which users of language assign meaning to a particular linguistic symbol, usually a word
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Equivocal language
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ambiguous language that has two or more equally plausible meanings
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SEMANTIC RULE Equivocation
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– statements/ words with more than one accepted definition – receiver has responsibility to clarify – equivocation can be useful in saving face ” I’ve never read anything like that before”
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Relative Words
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gain their meaning by comparison
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SEMNATIC RULES Relative language
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– words gain meaning by comparison to something else * warm, smart, fast likely – misunderstandings when interpreted from different perspectives *what qualifies as an inexpensive restaurant – difficult to measure * meaning best when linked to measurable term
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Static Evaluation
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the mistaken assumption that people are consistent and unchanging
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SEMANTIC RULE Static Evaluation
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overgeneralization of “is” statements *steve is heartless -can mistakenly assume people have unchanging natures – correct by subscripting * steve is heartless (unless he is playing with his puppy)
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Abstract Language
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vague in nature
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SEMANTIC RULE Abstraction
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-ague language that doesn’t describe specific behaviors *you’re mean – focus on specifics * you ignored the dog when it thought it would feed it – abstraction can be useful as verbal shorthand * can cover multiple behaviors in single statement
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Behavioral Language
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refers to specific things that people say or do
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Pragmatic Rules
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governs the way speech operates one everyday interaction
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Convergence
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the process of adapting one’s speech style to match that of others
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Divergence
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speaking in a away that emphasizes their differences from others
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Powerless Speech Mannerisms
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ways of speaking that may reduce perceptions of a communicator’s power
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Politeness
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communicating ins arts that save face for both senders and receivers
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Emotive Language
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seems to describe something but actually announces the speaker’s attitude toward it
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“It” Statements
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replace the personal pronoun “I” with the less immediate word “it” -communicators who use these statements avoid responsibility for ownership
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“I” Language
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clearly identifies the speaker as the source of a message
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“But” Statements
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explains why – the but cancels the thought that precedes it
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“You” Statements
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expresses a judgement of the other person – a “you” statement implies that the speaker is qualified to judge the target
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“We” Language
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implies that the issue is the concern and responsibility of both the speaker and receiver of a message
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Low-Context Cultures
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generally value usuing language to express thoughts, feelings. and ideas as directly as possible
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High-Context Cultures
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value using language to maintain social harmony
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Linguistic Relativity
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that the worldview of a culture is shaped and reflected by the language its members speak
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Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis
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Whorf observed tha the language spoken by Hopi Native Americans represents a view of reality that is dramatically different from that of more familiar tongues – therefore people who speak it describe the entire world as being constantly in process, whereas in English we use nouns to characterize people or objects as being fixed or constant
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Nonverbal Communication
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messages expressed by nonlinguistic means
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NONVERBAL CHARACTERISTICS
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– encoding & decoding sill are personally valuable – behaviors are informative – relationally relevant
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NONVERBAL FUNCTIONS
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– repeating – complimenting – substituting – accenting – regulating – contradicting
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Complementing
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nonverbal behaviors match the thoughts an emotions the communicator is expressing linguistically
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Substituting
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when communicators are reluctant to express their feelings in words
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Accenting
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certain words with a voice
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Regulating
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influencing the flow of verbal communication
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Mixed Message
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situation in which a person’s words are incongruent with his or her nonverbal behavior
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Leakage
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inadvertent signals of deception
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Monochronic
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emphasizing punctuality, schedules, and competing one task at a time
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Polychronic
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with flexible schedules in which multiple tasks are pursued at the same time
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Kinesics
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body position and motion
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Body Orientation
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the degree to which we face toward or away from someone with our body, feet, and head
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Posture
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the way in which individuals carry themselves erect, slumping, and so on
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Gestures
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movements of the hands and arms
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Illustrators
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movements that accompany speech but do not stand on their own
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Emblems
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deliberate on verbal behaviors that have a precise meaning and are known to virtually everyone within a cultural group
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Adaptors
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unconscious bodily movements in response to the environment
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Manipulators
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self-touching behaviors
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Microexpressions
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a brief facial expression
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Paralanguage
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nonverbal, vocal messages
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Haptics
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describe the study of touching
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Proxemics
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the study of the way people and animals use space
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Space Stages (4)
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-intimate distance – personal distance – social distance – public distance
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Intimate Distance
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begins with skin contact and ranges out to about 18 inches
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Personal Distance
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18 inches at its closest point to 4 feet at its farthest
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Social Distance
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4 to about 12 feet
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Public Distance
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outward from 12 feet
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Territory
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remains stationary – space to which we assume some kind of “rights” is our territory
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Chronemics
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The study of how humans use and structure time
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Listening
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processo making sense of others’ messages
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Types of Listening (2)
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mindful and mindless
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Mindless Listening
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occurs when we react to others’ messages automatically and routinely, without much mental investment
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Mindful Listening
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involves giving careful and thoughtful attention and responses to the messages we receive
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STAGE 1 OF LISTENING Hearing
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physiological dimension of listening
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Hearing Challenges
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– damage to sensory system – external noise and distractions
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Hearing Responses
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– hearing assistance – control environment * modify * relocate
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STAGE 2 OF LISTENING Attending
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psychological one and is part of the process of selection
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Attending Challenges
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– attention deficit, overload – selective perception – insulated perception – preoccupation ( snapchat, Facebook, etc) – rapid thought ( process what people are about to say) – psuedolistening ( fakeness, appear to be listening )
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Attending Responses
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– identify payoff for listening – listen for key ideas * filter out extraneous information * manage mindful vs mindless listening – pick subjects relevant to the listener – engage your listener with your delivery
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STAGE 3 OF LISTENING Understanding
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occurs when we make sense of a message -subject evaluation * misunderstanding feels the same as real understanding
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Understanding Challenges
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Ambiguity * what are you saying? Dislocation of encoding and decoding * that is a wicked rollercoaster Defensive listening * you look like Russel Crow
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Understanding Response
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– understand the listener or speaker – match content to listener’s life – be concrete and specific
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Listening Fidelity
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the degree of congruence between what a listener understands and what the message sender was attempting to communicate
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STAGE 4 OF LISTENING Responding
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giving observable feedback to the speaker – nonverbal – verbal communication as transactional
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Responding Challenges
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Stage hogging * turn conversation to ourselves Interrupting Insensitive listening * responding to superficial information * ignoring emotional content
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Responding Well
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Talk less Delay Judgement * especially during disagreement or attack
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STAGE 5 OF LISTENING Remembering
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ability to recall information – test of hewer listening has occurred – imperfect * only 50 % immediate recall * what remains is the residual message
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Remembering Challenges
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Key points Information overload Ambushing * storing information to use against someone later
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Remembering Responses
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– Repeat important ideas – Highlight key points – Repeat important ideas
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Psuedolistening
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imitation of the real thing, an act put on to fool the speaker
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Stage-Hogging
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strategy that tis a shift-response changing the focus of the conversation from the speaker to the narcissist
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Selective Listening
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respond only to the parts of your remarks that interest them
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Insulated Listening
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instead of looking for specific information , these people avoid it – they would rather not deal with the topic or issue
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Defensive Listening
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take others remarks as person attacks
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Ambushing
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listen carefully to you but only because they are collecting information that they will use to attack what you say
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Insensitive Listening
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respond to the superficial content in a message but miss the ore important emotional information that may not be expressed directly
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Prompting
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involves using silences and brief statements of encouragement to draw others out
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Questioning
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” the most popular piece of language” a istening response in which receiver seeks additional information from the sender
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Sincere Questions
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are aimed at understanding others
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Counterfeit Questions
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aimed at sending a message, not receiving one
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Paraphrasing
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statements that reword the listener’s interpretation of a message
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Supporting
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reveals a listener’s solidarity with the speaker’s situation
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Analyzing
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listener offers an interpretation of a speaker’s language
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Advising
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help by a solution
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Judging
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response evaluates the sender’s thoughts or behaviors in some way
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Referent
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the actual thing/nothing need be said -God’s name I AM
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Sign
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non-arbitrary relationship to referent – sometimes called a symptom – Jesus miracle were sings of what?
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Symbol
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Arbitrary relationship to referents – can attach to different referents – Bear: animal/ carry/ support, edure, direction
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Symbolic Advantages
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– allows “unreal” communication * abstract ideas, art, future, reasons’ motions, things not present, things seen w/ the minds eye – allows creativity in language *language always changing/ adapting * God face Adam responsibility for creating language
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Symbolic Disadvantages
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– indirect relationship to misunderstanding *people use same symbol for different ideas * wicked, fly, music – symbols can use meaning * noel and repeated uses can obscure original meaning * racist, fay , touture, awesome
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Semantic Rules
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– helps us assign meaning to particular linguistic symbol -essential to help us share meaning * language impossible if we cannot agree what “is” is – semantic problems is different meanings assigned to same word
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Synatic Rules
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– rules governing the structure of language shaping meaning * all cars are not the same T/F? ( punctuation matters) – different contexts, cultures, have different syntaxes *texting syntax a learned language
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Progmatic Rules
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– Meaning governed by the everyday context *”How are you?” from a friend , from a doctor * sexual harassment problems from misunderstandings – coordination occurs when everyone uses same pragmatic rules * teasing words of inside a relationship, offensive outside it
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LANGUAGES IMPACT Name & Identity
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* family names carry history and connection growth the past * names often identify ( or hide) cultural identities * affect of name on identity diminishes with personal knowledge * names important to God
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LANGUAGES IMPACT Affiliation
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*convergence: sharing speech patterns with attractive groups * divergence: speech patterns that emphasize difference
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LANGUAGES IMPACT Power
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* powerless speech mannerism signal relational standing * too much power in speech can be counterproductive – balance efficacy with need to maintain relationship
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Powerless Patterns
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– Hedges * I think I will * I feel like – Hesitations *ah, can you, um, pay me earlier? – Intensifiers * i’m not very impressed – Polite forms * god morning sir – Tag questions * that was a good movie, don’t you think? – Disclaimers * I do not mean to bother you, but can you………….
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DISRUPTIVE LANGUAGE Fact-Opinion Confusion
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– Face-opinion confusion * invite argument by presenting opinion as facts ** you wasted money you bought that game * less antagonistic to add language of responsibility **I think you wasted money
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DISRUPTIVE LANGUAGE Fact- Interference Confusion
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– using limited evidence to read the other’s mind – better to use perception checking
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DISRUPTIVE LANGUAGE Emotive Language
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– inserting speakers opinions into seeming factual statement – using language to make editing judgements – non emotive language stands better chance of acceptance
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LANGUAGE RESPONSIBILITY IT statements vs I statements
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– it statements let speaker avoid responsibility – I statements hold speaker accountable
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LANGUAGE RESPONSIBILITY But Statements
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– but can be confusing by mixing messages – can be face-saving device by prefacing criticism with praise – most clarity achieved when messages separated
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LANGUAGE RESPONSIBILITY I and YOU Language
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“you” language expresses judgement on the other person “I” language focuses ons speakers actions
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LANGUAGE RESPONSIBILITY WE language
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communicates togetherness and shared responsibility – but can be perceived as presumptuous if responsibility not shared
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Gender Differences
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WOMEN: subjective experiences, relationships MEN: objects, behaviors and events
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GENDER DIFFERENCES Motivation for Conversation
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WOMEN: create & maintain relationships , empathize MEN: fun, get something done, give advice
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GENDER DIFFERENCES Conversational Style
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WOMEN: indirect, elaborate, other oriented MEN: direct, succint, task oriented
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Detecting Deception
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– we are sensitive to unintentional emotional leakage – inconsistency shows emotional state has changed – signal perception much better than judgement
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Uncertain Interpretation
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-nonverbal expression is ambiguous – multiple interpretations usually possible – real-life interpretations no better than guessing
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Gender and Nonverbals
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WOMEN: generally more expressive, physically and vocally MEN: require more personal place – use larger, but fewer, gestures
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Culture and Nonverbals
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– symbols have different meanings from culture to culture – rules of appropriate expression after – we’re comfortable interpreting our own groups
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Body Movement
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– Body orientation – Posture
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Gestures
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-illustrators – emblems – adapters – manipulators
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Face and Eyes
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– complex – rapid – expressive
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Voice (Paralanguage)
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– emphasis – inflections – disfluencies – contradiction
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Touch (Haptics)
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– communicate types and status of relationships * functional/professional: hairdresser, doctor * social/polite: hadshake, pat on back * friendship/ warmth: high-five, high-length, and-holding * sexual: can be interpreted though different types * agression: pushing
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Effects of Touch
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– improve well being – increase liking – increase compliance – get yo’ posterior sued
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Appearance
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– physical attractiveness – clothing
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Physical Space ( Proxemics)
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Distance: each of us has a personal bubble – we manage entry to our bubble depending on person and situation
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Physical Environment
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– architecture and interior design guides behavior – arrangement of furniture can indicate relationship structures
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Time (Chronemics)
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CULTURAL DIFFERENCES *Monochronic: punctuality, one task at a time * Polychronic: flexible schedule, multiple tasks STATUS INDICATOR * whom will you wait for ? * how much time do we give people ?
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One-Way Communication
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– low sender frustration – high receiver frustration – low accuracy – fast
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Two-Way Communication
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– high sender frustration – low receiver frustration – high accuracy – slow
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Listening Importance
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– we spend most communication time listening – it’s absence can undo relationships quickly – key personal success
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LISTENING WELL 1)Prompting
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– brief statements or silences – designed to encourage talker to continue – can help talker reach deeper insights * personal discovery * talking the point of solutions
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LISTENING WELL 2) Questioning
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– advantage to questioner * supply facts for understanding * learn others thinking and emotions * learn others intentions – advantages in answering * encourage self discovery * discover solutions
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Counterfeit Questions
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– questions to trap or lead the speaker * ” you don’t want to go there’ do you?” – questions that make a statement * ” you’re going to vote for him?” – questions with hidden agendas * ” are you doing anything Friday night?” – questions with a correct answer * “do you think I’m handsome?” – questions with unchecked assumptions * “why don’t you care about my feelings?”
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LISTENING WELL 3) Paraphrasing
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– summarizing what you think is being said * not just relating verbatim * cross check understanding – paraphrased factual information * so you think we should invite Joe, but not Wendy?” – paraphrased personal information * ” so you’re worried about your job?”
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Approaches to Paraphrasing
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– change speakers wording – offer an example for speakers topic – reflect underlying theme or remarks
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Paraphrasing Properly
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– express tentatively, allowing correction – use in moderation * issue should be complex enough * should be enough time and concern * should do it while withholding judgement
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LISTENING WELL 4) Supporting
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– reveal listeners solidarity with situation – types * empathizing : support without agreeing * agreement * offers to help * praise * reassurance
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Unreliable Support
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– focus on the brighter future, not the moment – forbid others the right to their feelings – discount the importance of a situation – cast judgement on the other person – defend yourself from wrongdoing
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LISTENING WELL 5) Analyzing
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– offers interpretation of a message – helps create alternative interpretations – might add to complexity and confusion
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Careful Analysis
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– offer advice tentatively rather than absolutely * yours is only one interpretation – should be plausible – listener should be receptive first – motive should be focused on listener * goal isn’t to make yourself look smart
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LISTENING WELL 6)Advising
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– offering an opinion on a solution – four conditions * advice should be accurate * listener should be willing to accept * listener won’t blame you for outcomes * can be given in face-saving manner
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LISTENING WELL 7) Judging
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– evaluates thought for behaviors – can be favorable or unfavorable – constructive criticism designed for the future – two conditions * evaluation has been requested * intent is genuine constructive

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