Violations of Nonverbal Rules Essay Example

So in order to avoid such cases, I choose to stand quietly and let my counterpart to determine the size of the space.

As it is defined in the text book, the actual meaning of space and distance is framed by your relationships with others. The more intimate the relationship, the smaller the amount of personal space (Steve Duck& David T. Mamahan, 2010). The use of touch accompanies this idea of personal space. The amount that you can touch someone may not seem aggressive or dominating, depending on your culture's idea of space and touch. For example, in China, young, same-sex friends like to walk arm in arm. Such kind of behavior is regarded as intimate friendship in china, hile in America, such behavior is misunderstood, and people think that we are homosexual.

I have to keep my fellows at arm’s length in order to avoid being misunderstood. I can not tell if I violate the rules and social norms of America, or if Americans violate my county’s rules and social norms. I think it is our culture that decides our judgment on whether we violate the rules or not. All our nonverbal behaviors are products of our cultural environment. Anderson tells us that individuals are aware of little of their own nonverbal behavior, which is enacted mindlessly, spontaneously, and unconsciously (Larry A. Samovar, Richard E. Porter ; Lisa A. Stefani, 2000).

So, it is forgivable if someone violates nonverbal rules because of his or her lack of the knowledge of cultural difference. We can not use our personal cultural background as a guide for judging the actions, views, customs, or manners of others because it can easily cause

misunderstandings. Besides culture, the distance and touch between talkers is also relevant to the nations, the age, the sex, and other obvious features. In order words, all those factors may influence our valencing of nonverbal rule violations.

For instance, in most cases, touching is generally more appropriate for women than for men. Males touch their male friends less than they touch their female friends. Fear of homosexuality seems to be a strong reason why men are reluctant to touch one another. Although females are more comfortable about touching than men, gender is not the only factor that shapes contact. In general, the degree of touch comfort goes along with openness to expressing intimate feelings, an active interpersonal style, and satisfactory relationships. How do people value them determines their valencing of nonverbal rule violations.

The nonverbal behaviors we use decide, to a large extent, the quality of communication. It is important to note that nonverbal communication has different meanings in different cultures. It would be good to become conscious of my own and others' body language, especially in intercultural communication. Since I am in America now, I should learn to interpret Americans’ nonverbal behaviors from the present situations and American culture, so that I can avoid some violations of nonverbal rules and get along well with my American friends.