Interpersonal Communication – Unit 1

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Models of Communication
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Action/Message Transfer, Interaction/Message Exchange, Transaction/Message Creation
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Action/Message Transfer model
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One way linear message Sender ------(message)------> receiver ^noise Example: TV, spam email, radio, reading
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Source/sender
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thoughts, ideas, emotions
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encoding
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the thoughts, ideas, and emotions put into words and behaviors
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message
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all aspects of the communication, verbal and nonverbal
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channel
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pathway through which the message channels, the medium
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decoding
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the opposite of encoding, translating the message back into thoughts, ideas, and emotions
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receiver
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decodes the message
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noise
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anything that interferes with the message
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Interaction/Message Exchange model
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all the same elements as Action model, plus feedback, makes a loop, 2-way linear model, example: text messaging, pen pals, email
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feedback
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response to original message
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response latency
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a pause or interruption between the original message and feedback
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Transaction/Message Creation model
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same as Interaction model except parts are continuous and simultaneous, not linear, has a context, example: face to face conversation, talking on the phone
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context
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anything that affects the situation, culture, background, experience
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dyadic communication
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one on one, treat one another as unique individuals, maximize the presence of the other
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Impersonal communication
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conventional (replaceable, interchangeable), independent (not much impact/influence), superficial, creates ROLE relationships (filling some need)
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Interpersonal communication
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unique (irreplaceable), interdependent (mutually influence each other), deep, creates CLOSE relationships
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5 myths of interpersonal communication
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1.more words will make things clearer/better (overexplaining, makes situation worse) 2. meanings are in words (meanings are in PEOPLE) 3. all communication seeks understanding (ritualistic communication, deceptive communication) 4. relationship problems are communication problems (a lot of problems come from incompatible goals and personality differences) 5. effective communication is a natural ability (it's learned)
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Fundamental principle of interpersonal communication
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the quality of our interpersonal relationships stems from the quality of our communication with others
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Interpersonal communication is...
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irreversible (can't take it back), unrepeatable, inevitable (one cannot not communicate), intentional and unintentional, involves both content and relationship dimensions (content: ideas and info, relationship: implied meaning, classifies the content, tells about the relationship between two people), contextual (culture aspects, relational aspects), governed by rules (certain types of behaviors are preferred, others are prohibited; implicit: not specifically stated, explicit: told to us directly)
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Communication competence
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defined as effective and appropriate, there is no single \"ideal\" way to communicate, competence is situational, competence can be learned
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effective
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getting your point across, getting the results you want
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appropriate
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meeting the rules and expectations for that situation, enhances or maintains the relationship
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Characteristics of a competent communicator
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nexting, a large repertoire of skills, adaptability, empathy/perspective taking, cognitive complexity, self-monitoring
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nexting
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we always have the ability to choose what to do or say next, I control my behavior
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adaptability
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knowing the right choice/skill/behavior for different situations
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cognitive complexity
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ability to look at a situation and consider alternatives
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self-monitoring
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ability to ask yourself, \"how am I doing?\", monitoring your own behavior, thinking before you speak
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self concept
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a relatively stable set of perceptions that you hold about yourself, descriptive part of who we are
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self esteem
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our evaluation of our worth
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A large part of who we are is reflected in our...
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attitudes (+/- response, like/dislike) beliefs (conceptions about what is true/false, real/unreal) values (conceptions about right/wrong, good/bad)
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Private (perceived) self
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how we really think about ourselves, the person we really believe who we are
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Public (presenting) self
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the image we show to others, how we present ourselves
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material self
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reflected in tangible things like our cars, clothes, etc.
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social self
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sense of self reflected in our relationships and interactions
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spiritual self
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connected to beliefs and values, often core of who you are
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Characteristics of the self
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subjective, flexible (up until ~25 years old), resistant to change (cognitive conservatism, we resist editing ourselves)
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cognitive conservatism
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seek out information that confirms our sense of self
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How self concept develops (4)
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1. interactions with others (reflected appraisal - Looking glass self, peer groups influential, how people interact reinforces views) 2. social comparison: evaluating ourselves as compared to others (reference group - who you compare yourself to, superior/inferior and similar/different) 3. association with groups (that we're involved in) 4. roles
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how self concept affects interpersonal relationships
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decentering, self fulfilling prophecy, interpretation of messages
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decentering
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ability to move beyond yourself as the frame of reference, ability to take on someone else's perspective
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self fulfilling prophecy
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what you believe about yourself comes true primarily because you believe it
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interpretation of messages
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whether we respond in a +/- way can influence how we think of ourselves
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Interpersonal Needs Theory (Schutz)
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People have three primary needs (met through relationships). Need for inclusion Need for affection Need for control
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Need for inclusion
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our desire to belong and have significance is the most basic interpersonal need, three ways to address inclusion needs: the Under-social the Over-social the Ideal-social
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the Under-social
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low need for inclusion, \"loner\", independent
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the Over-social
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high need for inclusion, always want to be around others
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the Ideal-social
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feel comfortable with both inclusion and being alone
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Need for affection
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the need to feel and express love is the most intense of the interpersonal needs, three ways to address affection needs: the Under-personal: low need for affection the Over-personal: high need for affection the Personal: comfortable, in the middle
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Need for control
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we all have a desire to influence and be influenced, to respect others and be respected, three ways to address this: the Abdicrat the Autocrat the Democrat
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the Abdicrat
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low need for control, give power away to others
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the Autocrat
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high need for control, everything planned out
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the Democrat
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okay with being in control at times and not in others
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Changing self concept
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have realistic expectations, have a realistic perception of yourself, have the will to change, have the skill to change
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Perception
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the process of experiencing the world and making sense out of what we experience
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Interpersonal Perception
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deciding what people are like and giving meaning to their actions
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3 Stages of Perception
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1. Selecting 2. Organizing 3. Interpretation
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1. Selecting
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selective perception: things we choose to focus on and others we don't Why do we select certain cues over others? ease, personal relevance, familiarity, repetitive, distinctive
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2. Organizing
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putting information into convenient, understandable, efficient patterns; constructs; punctuation and closure
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What are some ways we organize info?
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Stereotyping?? constructs: physical, role, interaction, psychological
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Punctuation
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determining the causes and effects in a series of interactions
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Closure
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filling in missing information
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3. Interpretation
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attaching/making meaning, creating understanding
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Where do our specific interpretations come from?
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degree of involvement, relational satisfaction, past experience, knowledge of others
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Standpoint theory
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How a person's position in a society shapes her or his view of society in general, and of specific individuals; most often applied to the difference between the perspectives of privileged social groups and people who have less power, and to the perspectives of men and women.
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impressions
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a collection of perceptions we maintain to interpret behavior of others
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Impression Formation Theory
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-physical appearance and behaviors (what we notice) -what 3rd parties tell you -what they self disclose
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Crude Law of Relationship Impressions
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positive impressions are hard to acquire but easy to lose, negative impressions are easy to acquire but hard to lose
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Primacy effect
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we give more weight to initial information that we receive
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Recency effect
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we give more weight to the most recent or last information we've received
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Halo effect
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we learn some positive things about someone and we assume other positive characteristics are true without having any evidence (\"What's beautiful is good\" effect)
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Horn effect
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we learn negative things about someone and assume other negative characteristics are true without confirmation
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Impression management
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make guesses about how others will interpret our behavior, and then we act in a way so the other person will form the opinion of us that we want, using: physical appearance positive affect cues immediacy cues
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Positive affect cues
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signal warmth and kindness, example: tone of voice, body language, smiling
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Immediacy cues
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signal interest and involvement, example: eye contact, leaning forward while seated, nodding, direct body orientation, open posture
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Causal Attribution Theory
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how we understand the cause of people's behavior, internal or external
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internal attribution
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some quality/characteristic of that person caused the behavior
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external attribution
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situation/circumstance outside of that person caused the behavior
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Objectivity bias
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we treat our attributions as if they are facts
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Actor-Observer bias
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tendency to explain other people's negative behaviors as being due to internal characteristics and our own negative behaviors as being due to external circumstances
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Self-Serving bias
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tendency to take responsibility for positive outcomes and distance ourselves from negative outcomes
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Barriers to Accurate Perceptions
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ignoring information, oversimplifying, stereotyping, imposing consistency, focusing on the negative
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oversimplifying
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simple explanations are easier
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stereotyping
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placing someone in a rigid category and then interpreting all their behavior from that category, fails to recognize individual differences
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imposing consistency
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we overestimate the consistency of people's behavior
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Improving perception skills
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know yourself and your own tendencies, consider alternatives, become other-oriented, check your perception
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Indirect perception checking
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gathering more information based on behaviors and environment to either confirm or disconfirm your perception
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Direct perception checking
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asking the other person why they engaged in that behavior, avoid defense-arousing accusations
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Complete direct perception check includes:
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1. a description of the behavior you noticed 2. two possible interpretations of the behavior 3. a request for clarification about how to interpret the behavior
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empathy
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the ability to recreate another person's perspective, to experience the world from his or her point of view; three dimensions (perspective taking, emotional contagion, concern)
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perspective taking
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the ability to take on the viewpoint of another person, suspension of judgment
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emotional contagion
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we experience the same feelings that others have
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concern
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we have sincere interest in others' well being
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value of empathy for the recipient
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increased self esteem, comfort, trust
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requirements for empathy
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open-mindedness, imagination, commitment
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