Adult Attachment Styles and Romantic Relationships Essay Example

their romantic partners. Using Bowlby's concept of attachment styles, Hazan and Shaver classified the behavioral patterns exhibited by adults at different stages of their romantic relationships. They identified four attachment styles: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. The secure style observed in children is also seen in securely attached adults who display warmth, responsiveness, positive self-perceptions, positive perceptions of their partner and relationship. These individuals are comfortable with both intimacy and independence in their relationships which are characterized by longevity, satisfaction, trust commitment ,and mutual support.Securely attached individuals tend to be more satisfied in their relationships compared to those who are insecurely attached. The anxious-preoccupied style corresponds to the anxious-ambivalent style seen in childrenAdults who possess the anxious-preoccupied attachment style seek a strong sense of closeness, validation, and responsiveness from their romantic partners. They place an excessive amount of value on intimacy to the extent that they become overly dependent on their partner, often neglecting their own self-worth and blaming themselves when their partner fails to respond adequately (Mikulincer & Shaver, 2012). This attachment style is characterized by emotional expressiveness, concern, and impulsivity in relationships (Mikulincer & Shaver, 2012). Individuals with this style commonly exhibit clingy behavior and have low self-esteem which can potentially lead to depression or even suicide. On the other hand, individuals with a dismissive-avoidant attachment style desire both personal independence and independence from their partner similar to how avoidant children display an attachment style. They perceive themselves as self-sufficient and immune to the emotions associated with closely bonded relationships. As a result, they consider close relationships relatively unimportant. Those with a dismissive-avoidant attachment style tend to avoid intimacy because they view their

partner as less significant (Juhl et al., 2012).This text discusses different attachment styles in adults, specifically focusing on the dismissive-avoidant and fearful-avoidant styles. The dismissive-avoidant style is often observed in young adult males during the dating phase, who may feel frustrated by the lack of responsiveness and indifference towards others' emotions. These individuals are ego-maniacs, leading to dissatisfaction with others. On the other hand, the fearful-avoidant style corresponds to avoidant attachment in children and is commonly seen among adults in remarriage. Fearful-avoidant adults have often experienced abuse, leading to a lack of trust in romantic partners. They desire emotionally close relationships but also feel uncomfortable with emotional intimacy due to low self-esteem and a lack of reactivity. Despite their beliefs that they are unworthy of responsiveness and trust from their partner, this is not true. Overall, all attachment styles - secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant - share similarities and differences but have a common desire for romantic relationships. These attachment styles greatly influence satisfaction within such relationships.Dismissive-avoidant adults, who do not experience the same emotions as others, still possess a desire for relationships that motivates them to commit and face challenges, regardless of what may happen in the future. On the other hand, those with anxious-preoccupied and fearful-avoidant attachment styles often struggle with low self-esteem due to feeling unworthy of their partner's intimacy. This results in reduced social interaction and diminished contentment in romantic relationships. Their personal insecurities make it difficult for them to fully commit and adapt to changes. Interestingly, all attachment styles exhibit some degree of reactivity or response to relationship anxiety; ranging from none (dismissive-avoidant) to full (secure). However, adults lacking reactivity

show little concern for outcomes or level of commitment in their romantic relationships, including potential changes that may arise. Researchers evaluate adult's desire for relationships, self-esteem, and reactivity using an unusual situation whereby partners are assessed based on how they perceive their partner as a secure base and the relationship as a safe oasis - both representing important aspects within the experimental technique used.The unusual situation can be used to transform an insecure adult into a secure one by increasing awareness of their attachment style. In the unusual situation, adults with secure attachment typically have responsive partners, while those with insecure attachment often have partners who are insensitive or inconsistent in their affection. In this situation, adults evaluate if their partner is nearby, accessible, and attentive; if so, they feel loved, secure, and confident. Findings from the Strange Situation, ECR (Experiences in Close Relationships), and RM (Relationship Maintenance) research can predict whether a relationship partner is securely or insecurely attached. These findings and concepts such as intimacy, safe haven, and secure base have led to effective clinical and non-clinical interventions. Insecurely attached adults may seek treatment in a clinic or at home near their safe haven using adaptive skills. The ECR and RM inventories address inquiries about romantic desires and behaviors likely to be displayed in relationships. Adaptive skills benefit both insecurely attached and firmly attached adults in their romantic relationships as they respond to their partner's behaviors.These skills, as described by Feldman (2011), promote emotional availability and appropriate responsiveness in a partner. They also enable individuals to regulate both positive and negative emotions. In order to establish a secure attachment style, an adult who

is insecurely attached will utilize adaptive skills to counteract their partner's insecure behavior. This serves as a demonstration of having a secure attachment style.

In conclusion, most adults engage in romantic relationships where they behave and respond accordingly. Consequently, these experiences lead them to develop either a secure or an insecure attachment with their romantic partners. A securely attached adult is characterized by being warm and responsive to the demands of commitment, as well as being adaptable in navigating changes that arise within the relationship. Additionally, those who are firmly attached tend to exhibit higher levels of satisfaction within their relationships.

When one or both partners display insecure attachment styles, it can be beneficial for the relationship to move towards developing a secure attachment style. This shift proves particularly advantageous in terms of enhancing satisfaction, commitment, and effectively managing various changes that may occur within the relationship.

For individuals who are not securely affiliated in their partnerships, adaptive skills can be utilized through both clinical and non-clinical interventions with the aim of fostering a secure attachment style. The most effective intervention involves prolonged exposure to secure attachments within the home environment.

Looking ahead, this concept can potentially be applied in other contexts such as the workplace and higher education settings. Adults often form long-term relationships with coworkers and professors alikeReferences:

1. Edenfield, J. L., Adams, K. S., & Briihl, D. S. (2012). Relationship Maintenance Strategy Used by Romantic Attachment Style. North American Journal of Psychology, 14(1), 149.Retrieved from http://search.proquest.co.m.ezproxy.autonomy.edu:2048/docview/927903917

2. Ehrenberg, M. F., Roberts, M., & Pringle, J. (2012). Attachment Style and Marital Commitment in the Context of Remarriage.Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, 53(3), 204-219.DOI: 10.1080/10502556.2012.663270

3. Feldman, R.S.(2011).

Development across the Lifespan (6th ed.).Upper Saddle River, New Jersey: McGraw-Hill.

4.Heffernan,M.E.,Fraley,R.C.,Vicary,A.M.,&Brumbaugh,C.C.(2012).Attachment Features and Functions in Adult Relationships.Journal of Social and Personal Relationships ,29(5),671-693.DOI:10 .1177/0265407512443435

5.Juhl,J.,Sand,E.C,&Routledge,C.(2012).The article "The Effects of Nostalgia and Avoidant Attachment on Relationship Satisfaction and Relationship Motives" by Mikulincer.M & Shaver.P.R.(2012) from the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships,volume 29 issue 5 pages661-670 can be found at DOI :10 .1177/0265407512443433.

6.Another related article,"Adult Attachment OrientationsandRelationship Processes"by Nudson-Martin.C.(20lZ) is published intheJournalof Family TheoryandReview,volume4 issue4 pages259-274.The DOI forthisarticleis:10.1111/j.1756-2589.2012.00142.ten"Attachment in Adult Relationships: A Feminist Perspective" by Pittman.J. F. (2012) can be found in the Journal of Family Theory and Review, volume 4, issue 4, pages 299-305 (DOI: 10.1111/j.1756-2589.2012.00141.ten). Another article titled "Attachment Orientations: A Boon to Family Theory and Review" by Poulsen.F. O., Holman.T. B., Busby.D. M., & Carroll.J. S. (2013) is also published in the same journal's volume 4, issue 4, on pages 306-310 (DOI: 10.1111/j.1756-2589.2012.00133.ten). Additionally, a relevant article called "Physical Attraction, Attachment Styles, and Dating Development" by Selcuk.E., Zayas.V., & Hazan.C.(2010) can be found in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships,volume30.issue3,pages301-319(DOI:10 .1177/0265407512456673). Lastly,the Journal of Family Theory and Review publishes an article titled "Marital Satisfaction: The Role of Attachment in Marital Function" by Poulsen.F.O.,Holman.T.B.,Busby.D.M..J.S.(2013),in volume2.issue4,onpages258 -259(DOI :10 .1111 /j .1756 -2589 .2010 .00061.ten).