3040*Week 10
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Discuss what economic interdependence is and any cultural differences
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• Economic interdependence --> Cultural differences in financially supporting parents ? China, India, and Mexico Expected that adult children support family E.g., filial duty in China* - to contribute to the financial well-being of their parents ? US and Canada young adults are not expected to contribute to financial support of parents --> financial aid is given from the parent to the child More common for parent to support adult child
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Discuss the differences in living arrangement expectations for young adults in traditional and European countries
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? Traditional cultures Young adults continue to live with parents Japan: 10 million single young adults live at home ? European countries Live at home while attending college or until married Greece, Spain, and Italy More than half of 30 year olds still have not achieved autonomy associated with a job and a home of their own Factors that Influence Timing of Leaving OR Returning Home
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Discuss what occurs when leaving home in North American culture and the factors that influence leaving home - hint we discussed 4 factors.
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? North American culture - Timing of departure based on: 1. Parents' marital status ? Non traditional families leave home sooner 2. Parental expectations of when they should leave home 3. Parental resources 4. Economic considerations ? Housing costs, employment opportunities
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Discuss the differences between empty nest and full nest - discuss what is happening in the phenomenon of young adults leaving home.
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Previously - Young adults left home to attend university, get married, or set up their own home Empty Nest: parents home no longer contains dependent children Now - Called "Full nest" Young adults returning to live at home with adult parents into late 20's or even early 30's "Boomeranging "
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Discuss what boomeranging is and the characteristics of boomerang adult children
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• Boomerang adult children ? In their late mid to late twenties More likely to be male ? Do not own a home Higher living costs then in previous generations ? Have low incomes Main reason: lack of employment or low paying jobs In Western cultures, may not contribute to household expenses such as paying rent, utilities, or food
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Discuss the enduring bond between parents and adult children
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• Parental bond ranks high in importance ? 2nd to having a romantic partner or a best friend • Many young adults seek peer-like like relationships with their parents • Link between relationships with parents and other intimate relationships of young adults ? More positive relationships with parents are related to more positive relationships with partners and peers
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Discuss the process of relationship transformation in adulthood
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• Process continues as children age 20's, 30's thru 50's ? Continuing dependencies from parent to child and adult child to aging parent ? Continued negotiation of intergenerational hierarchies ? Creation of privacy rights and intergenerational boundaries E.g., ownership of psychological space, belongings, and information ? Independence with interdependence
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o Discuss how social roles develop
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• Parents and their young adult children exert a strong influence on each other's role development
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the process of parallel development
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*Process of parallel development ? Each contributes to the development of the other Generativity Filial Maturity
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what is generativity?
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the concern for establishing and guiding the next generation and is said to stem from a sense of optimism about humanity 7th stage, generativity versus stagnation
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o Discuss the changes that have occurred historically and in contemporary society in relation to generativity
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Historically Women: maintaining a household and caring for children Men: providing food and other goods for the family ? Contemporary Society Both individuals likely to be working, providing care, and guiding next generation
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Discuss how individuals develop a sense of generativity o What stage of Erikson's psychosocial theory is occurring?
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• Erikson's stage for adulthood ? Establishing and guiding the next generation Develop the ability to care for others - basic strength that reflects young adult maturity
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Discuss the difference in generativity development for collectivist cultures and individualistic cultures. How does each create their sense of generativity?
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• GENERATIVITY is relative to cultural norms Collectivistic cultures ? Link generativity with communal living Sense of generativity while being involved in cooperative efforts to maximize group success in the family and work place SUCCESS = BEING A GOOD PARENT Also earn respect of children, grandchildren, parents, co-workers, and individuals in their community Individualistic cultures ? Link generativity with Being the best parents they can be while being HIGHLY COMPETITIVE in their occupational roles Achieving individual success in their occupational role
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o What occurs regardless of culture?
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• Regardless of culture ? At individual level, the roles of parent and worker contribute to a sense that one's contributions to the family and/or workplace are valuable Success in these roles contributes to sense of generativity
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o Discuss how parents continue to support their adult children
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• Well into old age, parents continue to support adult children than be supported by them ? Money transfers and inheritances ? Routine help, advice, and services ? Psychological support ? Child care and grand-parenting
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Discuss how generativity is bidirectional for parents and their adult children
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• Young adults' development of a sense of generativity is related to being responsive to the needs of their parents • Rely on parents for support and guidance ? Young adult also "needs to be needed"
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Identify any differences with daughters and sons,
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• Adult children also provide advice and services to their parents Examples: Daughters give ADVICE and household help Sons assist with YARD WORK and repairs
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how adult children continue to involve their parents,
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Interdependence of parents and children is a lifelong process - Observed in the ways adult children involve their parents Weddings Births or adoptions of children Birthday parties Graduation celebrations
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how parents promote a sense of well-being, and the role of being responsive to parental needs.
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• Continue to influence each other's well-being as both generations age ? Create rituals to maintain active relationships and support each other during family crises
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Discuss the challenges to generativity as identified by Goldhaber (2000)
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Unintentional parenting (Goldhaber, 2000) ? Have children WITHOUT weighing costs or advantages Most adults choose to become parents and because they want to achieve generativity ? Most likely to have UNWANTED PREGNANCIES Younger, poorer, less educated adolescents and young adults Vulnerable in terms of quality of care and provide basic necessities
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What is the difference between filial maturity and role reversal?
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• Capability of adult children to respond to the needs of the parent ? Represents a move away from egocentrism and a step toward the development of a more mature adult role ? NOT ROLE REVERSAL --> Do not take on a parental role in relation to their parents ? They assume a filial role that involves the ability to be depended on by their parents
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Discuss what FILIAL MATURITY means? Discuss the 2 dimensions of filial maturity development and why BALANCE is important between the two dimensions.
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• Two dimensions are essential to the development of filial maturity: ? Parental DISTANCING ? Parental COMPREHENDING BALANCE is important between the two because its required for development ? Development in each of these areas requires the ability to balance these two forces ? Discuss from the perspective of the role of the adult child
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Identify and discuss the 3 phases of developing filial maturity.
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3 phases: 1. parental DISTANCING 2. RECONNECTING Phase 3. parental COMPREHENDING
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1. parental DISTANCING
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• Normal and beneficial process ? Critical for personal development during young adulthood to distance oneself from one's parents ? Create SEPARATE IDENTITY as an adult ? BUT simultaneously need to become responsive to needs of parent Challenge is to become emotionally emancipated while remaining engaged as a son or daughter
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1. parental DISTANCING (second slide)
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• Emotional weaning may be slow or painful for parents and adult children ? Triggered by physical separation from parent E.g., University or moving out ? Period of adjustment that may include criticism and reduced contact ? Can be stressful Challenge attachment bonds However, open communication and emotional expression can support the transition
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2. RECONNECTING Phase
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Stage of renewed acquaintance ? Distancing tempers young adults' egocentrism Helps them to see their parents more realistically ? Realistic parental perceptions also includes a greater appreciation of the parent as an individual Improved ability to perceive themselves in the adult child role Understand what parent needs from them
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2. RECONNECTING Phase (second slide)
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• Concerns for young adults during emancipation and renegotiation of parental relationships ? Issue of privacy ? Families must create etiquette to handle the delicate balance between parents' interest in knowing what is going on in their adult children's lives and their adults children's right to privacy What etiquette do you use in your family?
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3. parental COMPREHENDING
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• As children, focus is on parents to understand their children ? As children become adults, focus is for them to develop filial maturity Capable of understanding their parents ? Ability to comprehend parents requires objectivity from the young adult Realize that their parents had their own existence prior to becoming parents Continue to exist as individuals outside of their parental role
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3. parental COMPREHENDING (second slide)
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Slower process ? Lags behind parental distancing Usually in early 20's is when individuals begin to understand their parents Is a gradual process that occurred as they took on more adult roles held by their parents ? Reduction in conflict with parents ? Understand mothers earlier than father Typically in their 40's, parent is very old or after death of father
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Identify and discuss the 6 dimensions of the Intergenerational Solidarity model of Healthy Family Functioning proposed by Bengtson
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1. Associational solidarity --> Social contact and shared activities between family members 2. Affectional solidarity --> Emotional closeness of family members 3. Consensual solidarity --> Perceived agreement about opinions, values, and lifestyle choices 4. Functional solidarity --> Instrumental (social support - what are you providing/giving) and financial exchanges - what can I do for you? (function) 5. Normative solidarity --> Strength of feelings of obligation 6. Structural solidarity --> Geographic distance
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1. Associational solidarity -->
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Social contact and shared activities between family members
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2. Affectional solidarity -->
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Emotional closeness of family members
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3. Consensual solidarity -->
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Perceived agreement about opinions, values, and lifestyle choices
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4. Functional solidarity -->
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Instrumental (social support - what are you providing/giving) and financial exchanges - what can I do for you? (function)
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5. Normative solidarity -->
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Strength of feelings of obligation
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6. Structural solidarity -->
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Geographic distance
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Identify and discuss the advantages and critiques of this model
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Individual elements do predict healthy families ? not everyone can get along all the time BUT.... ? False idealized picture of family cohesion How things "should be" rather than "how they are" ? Focus on consensus and cohesion suggests that negative feelings and different points of view destroys cohesion Hides conflictual and contradictory elements of family experience
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Discuss what aspects characterize the quality of older parent relationships with their adult children - hint we discussed 4 of them
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• The quality of the relationships of older parents and their children is reflected in ? How close they live to one another ? The frequency of their interactions with each other ? The degree to which they provide mutual aid to one another ? The closeness or strength of feelings between them Intergenerational
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Discuss what intergenerational ambivalence is,
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• Argued that solidarity is not uni dimensional ? Evidence that most close relationships are characterized by ambivalence ? Provides a way of looking at everyday issues around care-giving to child or to parent, maintaining relationships, divorce.....
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advantages, and disadvantages to parent-child relationships.
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(Lüscher ; Pillemer,1998 ) • Polarized contradictory simultaneous emotions, thoughts, intentions, actions toward an adult child or parent ? Positive and negative emotions = mixed feelings "I love him but I could kill him" ? Being pulled in opposite directions regarding how to act Promote autonomy or independence Control but not too much control Reject beliefs and values, but values relationship Maintain family traditions vs. develop own traditions
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Discuss the 2 ways to think about ambivalence in parent-child relationships
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1. Ambivalence is INHERENT therefore must learn to live with it to maintain relationships ? Areas of acceptable disagreement among generations room for difference of opinion along with bottom lines ? Maintenance of "demilitarized zones" (boundaries) and mutual standoffs ? Avoid conflictual topics during discussion 2. Ambivalence provides an opportunity for qualitative change, or meaning making, in relationships by generating contradiction or uncertainty ? By confronting ambivalence and trying to find a solution to it Can generate new meanings and trajectories ? Examples Therapy or changing the family system
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SUMMARY
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In Summary • Parent and adult child relationships consistently change and evolve within each generation • The relationship requires a renegotiation by both individuals ? Adult children seek privacy but also need to create a new and mature relationship with their parents Parents are now viewed as individuals and not just the roles they occupy
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5. Which of the following is true about the factors that influence the timing of leaving home for North American young adults? A
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A. If parents have enough resources available B. Parent's believe that their children should leave home when they can earn more than $50, 000 a year C. Parent's believe that their children should stay home until they are married D. If parents are not married, the young adult stays home longer
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6. James is 27 years old and has moved back to his parent's house for the third time. James is B
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A. A failure to launch adult child B. A boomerang adult child C. A full nest adult child D. A empty nest adult child
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7. Historically, how have women achieved a sense of generativity? C
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A. Building careers B. Making family dinners C. Caring for children D. Household financial provider
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8. Who is most likely to have an unintentional pregnancy? B
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A. 35 year old Nicky who works as a lawyer B. 16 year old April who dropped out of high school C. 27 year old Janet who is finishing her masters degree D. 19 year old Leslie who just applied to college
